Traditiooooooooon, tradition!

In the usual Cajungal fashion of overthinking things, my thoughts turn to tradition this warm, bright afternoon.

I think that traditions are nice. They give me a warm feeling--like Baptisms, getting together at Christmas, and seeing something blue on the bride. But when it comes to me, I never want to be the one people look to to hold up a tradition.

I have so many ideas about how I want to do things in the future---things that I won't be doing for a LONG time, but still... I get so inspired by all of my ideas. I think I could make an event memorable without falling back on what's been done over and over again. And then it would be all mine, all from me. If someone wanted to continue it on after I died, fine. If not, that would be fine too.

It seems sometimes that traditions are too much about 'living for the comfort of others' (I heard someone use that phrase a month or two back, and it's been sticking to me. I can't shake it!). Selflessness is nice. Doing for others is nice. But we all have one life, and I think that the people who love us the most would be able to understand that.

Anyway, these are just a bunch of thoughts I'm trying to piece together. I'm constantly stuck between wanting other people's happiness and wanting to give into the little qualities about myself that I hide or play down because I don't want to be a disappointment. I think that this is something many people can relate to. In the end, I think, I am me and I'm going to have to listen to myself.